Dwelling on the past...

As an artist I try to take inspiration from everyday things to use in my creative process. It's been really fun changing over the past few years and really feeling the amount of growth and development I've undergone, both as a pianist and creative being.

I was recently invited back to accompany two of my former high school choirs as they prepared and performed for large group adjudications. I was a member of the concert choir, which is the highest level choir in my high school, for three of my four years there; and the women's chorus is now a comfortable creative outlet for my sister. I had mixed feelings about spending my spring break in a high school and seeing some (not many by this point) people I knew back then; however it proved to be rewarding in many ways and helped me to reconnect with my artistic roots and those teachers who first inspired me.

Although my main goal for the week was working with the choirs, I did take advantage of visiting my former theatre director. I have meet several amazing people in my life but this woman holds a high spot in my book of favorites. Her dedication to her art and her undying support of all levels of creativity is still as strong as the day I met her. If you know me well enough you already know that for me theatre was my life throughout high school. I could have cared less about academics; and why should I have when I had an incredibly talented group of people to work with. I don't regret my distribution of time one bit seeing as acting (not necessarily theatre itself) has all but left my life. Sure there is the occasional 'gig' but, I'm sure I will never get the thrill of hopping from show to show like I did then. I had a wonderful time visiting with her and like I said, she always helps me get in touch with my true creative self and always reminds me why I do what I do.

Working with my other previous obsession, our concert choir, was another wonderful opportunity. If you asked me to pick between choir(music) and theatre I honestly could not give you an answer. Both run through my veins so heavily that I can't imagine functioning without both. My high school choir director is another incredibly gifted man and I admire him for much more than just musical reasons. It always blew my mind how he can take a group of seventy-two teenagers in September, and by March turn them into seventy-two incredible musicians, not to mention having them all focused on one thing -- success.

The adjudications were held at Avon Lake High School in their beautiful performance facility. As soon as I walked on stage with the group a rush of memories flew my way. My sophomore year in high school was my first year in concert choir and coincidentally we were the second choir in the history of the school to receive a superior rating at state adjudications which were held on that very same stage four years ago.

I only had one piece to play with the group, but as I was playing (on a concert hall-worthy Steinway) I was thinking to myself: "some of my greatest musical experiences have been with this choir, with this director, and playing with them." I know very well that I am not the same pianist I was four years ago, nor I am I the same pianist I was two years ago pre-college and conservatory life. Despite all of my numerous solo performance opportunities at college I was amazed to come to realization that the times I have felt most fulfilled and most blessed as a pianist has been the moments I spent playing with my concert choir. Here I am playing music that is hardly profound when compared to a Beethoven sonata or a Brahms Intermezzo, but at the heart of this 'simple' music is the true meaning of what music really is. I have come to discover that sometimes the most simple of tasks, or music for that matter, can be the most rewarding and fulfilling; and this most recent encounter was no different.

It's really amazing how quickly we change and how easily we can extinguish the spark that started it all. I hope that artists everywhere can take the time to appreciate this advice. When times get rough and you really feel stuck in the mud, take a minute to remember what brought you there in the first place. Learn from the past and let that guide you into the future. Everyone's future is bright and shinning, sometimes you just need something to light your way.